Horse watching (Photo credit: @Doug88888)
I’ve not been at the stables for several weeks now. It’s due to a combination of depression and physical healthproblems. You would think that the one thing that would help with my depression would be to be with horses. Funnily enough, this is not the case IF the act requires:
- a horrid journey on the overground, and the bus both there and back, (not particularly pleasant especially if you have social anxiety)
- working in a social situation. If I had my own horse or the chance to be left alone looking after one or two horses, then this would be helpful for my depression. Please do bear in mind that I am not putting down the stables or the people who work there. I couldn’t have chosen a better stables for understanding and tolerance for the disabled.
My absence from the stables is a sure indicator that something is not right within me. It is one of the reasons why I haven’t posted on this blog regularly. I just don’t have any stories to tell unless I tell those of my training in Exeter when I was younger. It may end up being one of the ways to go when I don’t have any recent news to post about.
Another indicator of when my depression has taken hold, is the time I spend playing video games. Unfortunately it didn’t stop me self-harming just a couple of days ago. I had to fight the urge to do so last night. My problem is – “I get to thinking too much!”
Never a good thing, that.
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- How can I own a horse stable without being overly wealthy? Creative ids (ask.metafilter.com)
- Social Anxiety, you are a jerk (sociallyangsty.wordpress.com)
- The horridness of a depressive mind (susieslittleinspirations.wordpress.com)
Thanks for including my post, this weekend has been particularly bad with complete meltdown. You talked about self-harming if you have a search on my page for my poem ‘The tickle of the blade’ I think you will like it too. I wrote it for a friend of mine who self-harm’s. xx I wish you well from susie
Hi Susie
Thank you so much for your comment and I found your poem; and yes I did like it! I’m not a great fan of poetry (even though I’ve written a couple myself) but I do like yours. So easy to read, understand and so true! I think I over-complicate my poetry way too much 
Glad you like it, seemed appropriate for how your feeling, to be honest I think a lot of my stuff will make sense to you. x